Be Healed

As a seer and healer I have frequent talks with spirit. I need to be tuned in and fairly open energetically in order to hear my guidance. Sometimes I am not the best listener and I get my direction in time. Weeks ago I asked how to make any healing last long or become permanent. Now I have some understanding.

Usually healings take place and then all of us usually revert back to whatever closed thinking, dysfunction or previous physical state full of blocks & barriers. Even with a truly gifted healer, the effects may be temporary. Why, because we undo it. In order to make a healing permanent you must release any control or influence that you believe that you have over the situation. It would be like handing the entire situation to God and NOT taking back any control over it.

Most of us can’t do this. If we have a habit of overthinking a situation or physical state, we will likely still keep overthinking it past the time of healing. You would have to adopt complete faith and this is something that we all have a hard time doing. Most people can’t release all control over any important life circumstance. It is not our nature to do this easily. The only time we would take this step readily is if we were raised around and within a culture of total faith.

Have you ever wondered about the people that attend a Tent Revival and suddenly begin to walk again? Aside from the potential that this situation is staged, this would be a monumental feat. If you are the person who can walk again, how would you respond to this situation? Would you wake up in the morning and still be able to walk? Is it possible that you would need your wheelchair again? With total faith and an absence of doubt, this person may be able to walk from that healing forward.

We have talked about miracles in the past. These situations are very real. My own sister had a rollover accident and she reported to EMS and police that someone pulled her out of the wreck while the car was on its roof. Witnesses to the accident stated that there was no one there and she climbed out of the wreck unassisted. Who pulled her out of the wreck? She did not get injured. Not even a scratch. She pulled out in front of a car traveling 50 mph or more and her SUV was t-boned. Something Divine was at play here. Someone saved her from injury and pulled her from the wreckage. Obviously the lessons in this situation were not about severe injury in an auto wreck. This was our own miracle.

So where do you start? In order to be fully healed you must work on the issues in your life that hold you back from optimal health and well-being. Undo the physical, emotional and functional damage. Become the perfect “vessel” for healing.

What is a perfect vessel? Hollow.

You may wonder how you may be hollow when you have organs, blood, bone and other body tissues. Do you have to envision all of these contents when you evaluate your body’s well-being? No! Perceive yourself as full of light and bright, fluid colors. Imagine these stunning lights moving freely throughout your being. Now, push those beautiful colors outside of your physical boundaries. You are a stunning orb of God’s Light and love.

Banish any knot or bundle of stagnant energy. Flush these colors throughout your day. Whenever you think of it pump the vividness of your colors back up to phenomenal. Remain hollow and resist any physical form. Fluid, crystal clear and bright. This is a perfect vessel.

Now, how many ways are we capable of undoing this perfect vessel? Several. What is the best direction for each of us in order to maintain that perfect state? Be vigilant and meditate. Vigilance requires frequent attention. You must flush out all negative energy or darkness throughout your day. If you forget, most of everything that you have managed to release will come back. Meditation is key as well.

Finding an inner state of calm and receptivity to God will bring about some dramatic changes. Those moments are what complete faith feels like. You envision yourself as that hollow perfect vessel and allow God, spirit and other Heavenly Hosts to communicate with you. You resist active thought. You keep your mind blank and open. You remain grounded, centered, cleansed and cleared. Your breathing is slow, deep and rhythmical. You brighten your colors to fill the room and you don’t take back any control. You become ONE with the Universe.

Find this state each day and refuse to be guided by ego, greed and fear.

Now I am going to sit back and relax and wait for spirit to tell me all the ways you intend to fill back up with what you want, need or can’t let go of. This is the lesson. Without you becoming the perfect vessel for healing, you will go unhealed.

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A Desert Period

There are times in life when not much happens. There may be a lull in emotional events and fairly reasonable success in all other areas of your life. There are desert periods charted for various reasons. It may be a time of learning where you read books, attend groups, take some courses, focus on your family and friends, set some goals, relax… There are some specific purposes for these periods. Normally, you would recognize when the desert period ends because life would seem to start up again and bring you more challenges to respond to.

These are some expected desert periods. Then, there are desert periods that you create by bowing out of life or being in denial. This would be a type of self-isolation or self-defense. This type is not charted and does not promote healthy coping, learning or relationships. You are simply ignoring life.

You felt some joy and relief that you could skip some of your charted experiences. You missed the point. Skipping experiences that are definitely below your current energy vibration is allowed. Yes you may skip negative events, behavior and relationships and there may be actual desert periods to account for the lack of activity…BUT… you cannot just skip out on life.

Life was intended to be difficult. That is what you embraced. Now, you may feel that some things are too negative or cumbersome to manage and you want to opt out. This was not intended. The more complexity you charted, the higher evolved that you are spiritually.

You would not have been allowed to chart such contrast without the ability to manage it.

It truly is a blessing that you wanted to work so hard in this lifetime that you would make some real progress. You are that strong.

Simple right from wrong and yes and no charts are written for people who are of lower vibration. They may have had some dark lives and they are just starting their ascension. They have charted simple tasks which are fairly direct and straight forward. They chose to place these right/wrong lessons before themselves in order to become more familiar with choosing right instead of past lives of choosing wrong. YOU are not this person. You are here on this site because you have found the desire to be evolved, informed and enlightened.

You may still make some wrong, misinformed or negative choices but you are here seeking God and absolution. You realize that you are responsible for your own soul and there are more positive places for you to occupy.

This may be true of your soul but now that you are human, life seems to hold too many difficult experiences. You want to opt out of some heart break and hardships. Try to remember that you charted life to learn specific lessons and experience certain things in order to learn more. You have some basic knowledge about a lot of things as a soul in the afterlife. You made a decision to expand your experience in certain areas. Very much like rounding out your general knowledge.

You may have had success in love many times and now you want to experience heart ache and loneliness. This is to expand your knowledge in this one area. You may have had lives of prosperity and now you want poverty. Yes, it sucks. But this is what you wanted. The opposite may also be true. You may have had lives of poverty and now want immense prosperity. Enjoy!

The caveat is, after many lives of poverty, you may dwindle down your cash and resources to again be in the more familiar state of poverty. After lives of being lonely and isolated you may force your loving partner and family to abandon you so you may return to the more familiar life of loneliness. These life lines can’t go unchecked. You would not want to destroy a loving, positive, successful life in order to revert back to a previous state of existence. This may happen inadvertently. If you wander through each day without feelings of responsibility, you may undo some very beautiful aspects of your life.

Don’t opt out. Trust that you are higher evolved and you set some pretty impressive goals for yourself. You came here to succeed and return home with some hard-won spiritual advancement. Stay on course. Get through the good times and the bad. Wear your experiences with pride.

A good metaphor may be that you are seeking a degree in life. You have lifelines in the required areas of love, family, wealth, spirituality, health, accomplishment, charity… You have required courses and elective ones. The goal is to obtain a degree which covers all areas of life with a focus in one or two specialized topics. You can’t skip any courses. If you do you won’t get a degree. You must fulfill all requirements or fall short and have to put in some extra semesters. No one wants to put in any more work than is necessary. Do the work and get your degree.

You are here to round out your learning in areas that you may be lacking. Or, you wanted to get a higher final grade. None of this sounds easy or superficial. You understood this. If you didn’t have goals, there would be no reason to be here.

Understand that a desert period may be charted but for specific reasons. Being lazy, subversive or in denial is NOT a desert period. You may think you are savvy or unconventional but when you return to the Other Side, you may be sorely lacking. Savvy turns sour in a hurry.

A Big Surprise

This may come as a complete shock to you but it is OK to skip some things that you have charted!

Surprising right? The only time that this is recommended is when the event, relationship or journey is of a lower vibration than where you are. We will try to explain this so that everyone is able to comprehend what we mean.

Take for example a woman who has been unfaithful to her husband a few times in the past. For various reasons she stepped outside of her marriage. Then, she either resolved some emotional issues or made a determination that she will behave with more truth and honor. She stopped cheating. She raised her vibration by making this necessary step. Perhaps she charted a few more affairs. It is ok for her to skip those subsequent relationships because she has already ended this cycle of negative behavior. She is now above any relationship which demeans or undermines her marriage and husband.

Another example is a man who has a step-son. He has an extensive history of disliking this young boy for various reasons. After some time, he has begun to see his actions as unfair and unsupported by the child’s own behavior. He realizes he was angry at the situation, not the child. He decides to make amends and treat the child more fairly. He may have charted some more detrimental actions and attitudes toward this child and it is good that he is able to skip these lower vibration actions. He has risen above his previous behavior and is entitled to behave with more honor.

What happens when you skip anything in your chart? The surprising fact is that each chart has many option lines. You did not just write one story that can only progress from one point to another. You actually charted a wide variety of options. This accounts for some of the changes that occur. You may raise or lower your vibration depending upon how you feel, others’ contribution or what type of reactions occur from you or anyone else involved.

Random events do occur, but not often. The greatest source of variance would be people who are dark. They may not have charts and they could impact your life in a variety of ways. Either you have some relationship with a darker person or one impacts you in some way. This would account for some unplanned or uncharted delays or detours.

You may also skip or divert a situation by seeking Divine intervention. Miracles happen and it is possible that in a moment of desperation, you may be granted some altered consequence or reprieve.

You may change or shorten a difficult life cycle by rising above it much earlier than expected. This is optimal! You may be able to respond to many life circumstances with absolute faith. In these instances you would jump well ahead of your chart. Then, you may experience a lull in events or another charted lifeline will begin. If you then slide backward, your original chart may resume. This is very possible. You may possess Divine inspiration in one moment and return to your normal level of faith in the next.

The complexities of life charts may sound truly intricate. Please remember to rise above any negativity, build faith and make uncommon decisions that boost your vibration and allow you to burst forward. Embrace God and the inspiration that comes from deep faith and a spiritual perspective.

It is always better to treat people with more respect than you normally would. It is encouraged that you stop lying, manipulating or attempt to cheat anyone. Improve your interaction with people, pets, the environment, private property… This is the best way to go and your overall spiritual success will respond as well.

Your vibration takes into account your behavior but also your thoughts and feelings to a lesser degree. If you harbor anger toward others but resist demonstrating this, your vibration will still suffer. If you think, feel and behave more positively, your vibration will increase. It matters much more that you truly find understanding and forgiveness and not simply state that you have.

You may have heard people state that thoughts become real. As far as your overall vibration, this is true. Being a better person goes deeper than what you display to the outside world. This is something that you must take into account. Find faith deep into your soul. Altering your behavior superficially does very little for your energy vibration and spiritual success.

Walk the walk AND talk the talk. Your Light shines from deep inside you out into the world. You are the answer that you seek. Live up to it.

Renewal

We have talked before about exit points and that anyone may choose to leave at a designated point for many reasons. They may have felt their jobs were done, they had little more to gain from staying any longer or they wanted to teach others through their loss.

Mass deaths occur for many reasons but it usually about bringing people together. The past has shown many examples of this. Lives lost to terrorism are intended to bring everyone together without care about religion, ethnicity, gender, sexual identity… The death of a child is the loss of everyone’s child, metaphorically. The recent London attacks were to bring all others together to grieve the loss of human life, not by identifying characteristics but because we are all human.

That day we lost “family members.” We did not stop to demean their existence with acceptable or unacceptable traits and identities. In the early hours of the attack we simply felt the loss. Our hearts ached. Hopefully we never stopped to identify who resembled us more or which lives lost was of more value. This is global consciousness. We felt genuine emotion for people we never knew and the families that suffered the losses. This brought us together in energy.

This energy of togetherness blanketed the earth and we boosted healing for our entire global community. For a time we felt genuine emotion for others around the world and not just in our home or community. The goal would be for many of us to accept that we don’t need any barriers between us. Mothers, brothers, children and other loved ones are worthy of our respect. Any life lost to violence is a tragedy. How many people adopted a global policy to respect any human life? This would be an optimal outcome.

Tragic losses bring all of us closer together. For a time we drop any prejudice and simply choose to love. A love without boundaries.

We may be at any age or point in our development to fully understand and accept this truth. Some of us adapt, some of us recover prejudice after a brief period and some of us never felt the compassion for anyone who perished. We are at different levels of spiritual maturity.

As for the losses in my community, there are many aspects at play.

  1. Many that died did not take care of their health. Diabetes, kidney disease, heart disease… ravaged their bodies and left little good tissue to carry on the workload of life. Not enough good health to make a difference. The denial that they embraced to avoid their illness was the same denial they used to avoid understanding that life could not continue with this much damage. Their lack of attention to their health left loved ones searching for answers.
  2. Many that died abused drugs and alcohol. They did not stop and turn things around. They left spouses, parents, children and many loved ones behind because their addiction was more powerful. In some ways they used denial to escape reality. The Dr. had warnings of poor health and permanent damage. Some stopped going to the Dr. Others were left clinging to the medical practitioners believing that intervention could save them from themselves. Despite this desperate hope, they died anyway. Their irrational escape did not hold any truth.
  3. Some people that died chose to let go and return home. Life had taught them enough and they were the kind of tired that only happens after many years of living. Everything ached. It hurt to move. They had lost so many of the pleasures in life that the Other Side seemed like a good choice. They did not commit suicide. They let go. After time they understood that it was ok to leave and their families were brought to that point as well. It was time.

As a community, we truly came together. The gatherings served to provide all of us with support and reassurance. We were forced to face that we must take better care of ourselves. We must also overcome our addictions. And, we must keep our loved ones close.

The shock of losing someone too young caused more pain than an elder who was losing their battle to stay. Week after week we were faced with more tragedy. People died were our own age or younger. We were close or we hardly knew them. Every family was touched by loss and we still have people close to death. It is not ending anytime soon. This cycle is still at work and we struggle to comprehend what we are facing.

Many of us are in a haze of shock. It is almost too much to manage emotionally. Still we carry on because that is what people do.

This is what I have come to know. Renewal is for those lives lost and for those of us left here. This is a community process. Dialog is needed and appreciated. Change is necessary. Lives matter.

Renewal of one person’s life because it was time to begin again.

Renewal of the love we share for friends and family.

Renewal of our feelings of protectiveness for our family and friends who suffer from illness.

Renewal of earth’s emotional climate from stagnant energy leaving and new life beginning.

Renewal of forgiveness and accepting that we all deserve love and respect as we leave this plane.

Renewal of hope that someone/anyone will leave their addiction behind.

Renewal of hope that we will make better decisions from here on out. These lessons have hit us hard.

Renewal of hope that the next 7 generations will be better than the 2 or 3 that are currently here on earth.

 

My Landslide of Grief

There are times when you suffer many losses during a short amount of time. Usually the losses are similar to the ones listed. Not often do you experience the death of significant people in a short amount of time. It does happen, but not often.

It is a series like this that people will state that they “haven’t recovered” from all those close deaths. You could meet someone ten years later and they will still mention this series of deaths that they were unable to get through. You realize that the pain is still causing them emotional distress. This mountain of grief is difficult to manage for any person. Ideally, they could process the loss of one person at a time until they have resolved a major portion of their overall grief. Most people won’t do this. They will continue to look at the entire group of losses and remain unable to recover emotionally.

We have stated many times that no event is intended to undo you. Each event is a lesson. You needed to learn a variety of things from one loss and then be prepared for any future losses. The culmination was meant to be lessons learned not a pile of grief added to the current pile.

I have experienced a lot of grief in the past three months. My family had to euthanize a guinea pig after struggling to heal him from a tumor removal. We made the decision to end his suffering but our grief was monumental. He was very much a part of the family.

Then I lost a dear aunt after a short illness. It was expected but still painful. We lost her sister only 1 year ago. So this is a good example of layering. Recently, our hamster died. We struggled to care for him but we could not save him from illness.

We have lost several community members in close procession. People I knew and people I knew of. Many younger than you would expect. We had one mother lose three sons within a year. One in his late 30’s from a medical problem, one in his late 20’s from an overdose and the most recent one in his early 30’s of an overdose.

Then, of those community members, I lost a male cousin who was only 55 to a massive heart attack. He was only 2 years older than me and this was completely unexpected. His brother is currently in the late stages of lung cancer and will die soon at the age of 53. So that will be two deaths in one family within a month. Both far too young.

We have lost nearly 10 people in our small reservation community in the past 3 months.  With 2 more quickly approaching death.

I’m at a loss for words. I haven’t posted for a while because of this mind-numbing trend. Perhaps I don’t yet embrace the lessons that were intended. Maybe I am not listening. Perhaps I don’t have an open-mind.

I work with many people who have lost someone. It is almost too numerous to mention. But what is our lesson? What do we need to learn as a community?

Two died of overdoses so this obviously speaks to drug awareness, prevention and intervention. Many died from complications of Diabetes. This is something that any native community deals with. The people who died of heart disease may also be attributed to Diabetes. Then two people died of cirrhosis. With lifelong alcohol abuse, their bodies shut down and they succumbed. We also have a higher rate of alcoholism so complications are common in our community.

No one remembers a time when we have suffered so many losses this close together. When I ask spirit, “why?” I get one word, “renewal.”  If you lived here, knew the members of this community and suffered this many losses close together, what does renewal mean? No one has found the answer, including me.

I will keep searching. My impression is that I don’t have enough distance from the pain yet. With some amount of healing I will listen and learn what renewal means and how this happens in my own community. I will hear more words from spirit and will resist shutting down in exasperation. I will find some solace and allow my heart to heal.

This is why I am here. I am a messenger but for now I don’t really know what the message is.

I have faith. I understand there are intended lessons. I understand that we are meant to be brought close together without any boundaries between us. We have all been touched by drug, alcohol, medical and accidental deaths. Some losses were expected and others were not. Sometimes death does not just touch the elderly.

There are times when a loss happens and you have time to find your faith and get through it. There are other times when losses happen so close together that coping simply means getting through one day at a time.

We will find out what renewal means and we will do it together. You may be able to place your finger on the truth now while I am still simply trying to manage. The messenger has some learning to do.

Many Sources of Grief

Whenever we speak of grief a lot of people feel it is solely about the death of someone. This is not the only cause of grief. There are many different sources that are common to all people and there are events or circumstances that create grief in someone selectively.

Here are some common examples:

  1. The death of a pet.
  2. A significant illness in which one may lose some functioning.
  3. The loss of a job.
  4. Moving to a new apartment, home or other housing.
  5. A divorce or loss of a romantic relationship.
  6. Miscarriage.
  7. Graduating from school, college or trades program.
  8. A loved one moving out of town.
  9. The sale or donation of household items or things that have sentimental significance.
  10. A major change in one’s personal status i.e. weight gain, weight loss, the need for corrective lenses, onset of inability to eat certain foods…
  11. Medical conditions common with aging such as high blood pressure, heart disease, diabetes, arthritis, cataracts…
  12. Requiring medications or treatment for medical problems.
  13. Becoming a parent, grandparent, great grandparent which may cause you to feel “old.”
  14. Significant debt, bankruptcy or other cause of feeling financially unstable.
  15. The death or significant illness of community members, celebrity or public official close to your own age.
  16. A class reunion.
  17. A wedding anniversary for an advanced length of time such as 30 years, 50 years and so on.
  18. Dramatic changes in your community such as a building being demolished, a new franchise in town, an old business closing, the loss of a police force, a house fire, violence…
  19. Any legal action such as being sued or bringing a lawsuit against someone else. This is worsened if it lasts a significant amount of time or results in a significant loss of resources.
  20. Retirement.

Some of the examples are not purely bad or negative. It is possible that these “happy” events also have some negative aspects or drawbacks. Any event or circumstance may cause some melancholy or mild feelings of loss or change.

Do any of these events cause you to have a permanent change? Is the impact only temporary? Does any one person actually have a few of these events at the same time?

Any of these events may add another layer of grief to the layers that are already in place. Once you have added layers are you able to process any grief-causing situation or are you basically shut down? In essence, are you able to process and release any childhood grief at this time in your life? Not without intention. Ask anyone who has actually released any childhood issues if they could have done it without addressing it on purpose. This is not likely. Once anything is buried, it usually takes a concerted effort to unearth it and find a way to make it better. There are those times when significant childhood issues surface without warning. Then what do you do? You either suppress it again or you make an effort to feel better about it or some combination of the two.

Are you able to recognize how layers of grief make your current level of coping more difficult? Any event that disrupts your feelings of grief may cause you to become overwhelmed. It is like scratching the surface of a lava flow. The underlying layers are intense and difficult to manage. Your normal ability to function may pale in comparison to the intensity of the lava. It may take some time in order to regain your perspective and believe that you are able to cope effectively again. How many steps did you take backward when presented with the lava? Now you must begin again. This feeling alone may cause you more grief.

As you have seen, grief may come from many varied sources. It may get easier to cope with grief. It also may get so intense that you feel unable to function effectively. You may be surprised where your feelings of grief have come from. It may be any change in your normal life that brings about feelings of sadness, discomfort or requiring adjustment.

We come back to the concept of perspective. Any change in life may be approached as positive or an occasion for learning. Even the times that you feel you are moving backward may be the best opportunities to learn, make adjustments and become wiser. It is truly the best perspective if you are able to be thankful for contrast. No action, event or circumstances would be outside of your ability to cope effectively.

“What could you do if you knew you could not fail?” This attitude would open a world of possibilities for you to live with. All matters are manageable. Everything will teach you some valuable lessons. Even a cycle of the same circumstances could still teach you something new each time you experienced it.

Now we come back to your perspective on the afterlife. Every experience is a lesson. Anything positive or negative is intended to teach you. You have written this chart and there are actually very few things that happen that are random or unplanned. This is your own lesson plan that you wrote with a large amount of consideration. You understand what you need to experience and learn. You want to grow and mature in all areas of life so you believe that these experiences will round out your soul growth.

To understand this makes everything fall into perspective. Grief is unnecessary. Grief is what humans experience when they think that they have lost something. This is never the case. Even in your own life you could write a list of events that have caused you grief and you could list the number of things that each experience taught you. You have lost nothing. In reality, you have only gained knowledge, insight and wisdom. You cannot fail, truly.

Calling All Angels!

This is Lisa. I have been in a weird space recently. I lost my Aunt one week and my sister was baptized the following one. This seems like a wide range of emotions very close together.

Today I asked for angels to come to me and give me wisdom and guidance. I was not disappointed. I feel emotionally stable again…for now.

We are not done with the “life after death” topic. This is a small detour that I needed for myself.

  1. Stay calm and serene. Spirit may intercede for you more efficiently in this state.
  2. Quieting your thoughts helps Universal guidance to flow to and through you.
  3. Be grounded upon High and be grounded upon Low. It is this gentle state in between that creates the balance and spiritual stability that you need.
  4. Remain balanced even when you are stressed, surprised or unhappy. An over-reaction causes a ripple effect in your stasis. Thereby much more will become unbalanced as a result.
  5. Top to bottom and everything in between works in concert together. A focus upon just a few areas creates an imbalance. Seek total health and nutrition. What is ingested is as important as what is eliminated. Be aware of both processes.
  6. Brighter more brilliant colors aid in your stability as well. Flush and refill all throughout your day. This helps to release any issues or concerns which are not worthy of your time and attention.
  7. More love in your heart and more love sent out to others will bring an exponential amount of love to you. Love is compounded and grows well in this positive medium.
  8. Brisk and lucid energy brings more grace and understanding to you. All matters are allowed to flow in and flow out. Nothing is valuable enough to hold on to. If it is glorious, you will have constant access to it anyway.
  9. Grace brings a positive, healthy glow to you which others will be drawn to. From there you will infuse them with good health and well-being.
  10. Travel only matters if it brings you enrichment and expansion. Much of what is necessary may be learned here, on your own.
  11. Grace is in never-ending supply. The times you feel barren and exhausted is because YOU have stepped out of the constant flow.
  12. Hearing from departed loved ones is a precious benefit and it must be shared with all others. Giving freely will bring progress and good graces to you as well.
  13. Faith covers all bases. There is never a moment when you are left without guidance, love and support.
  14. Any energy may be channeled into good energy. Don’t forget to change directions when you begin to struggle. This step will change your life dramatically.
  15. It is never a bother to stop and learn from life’s circumstances. To avoid any adversity would render life meaningless.
  16. “Beauty” is assigned its meaning by you. Any event, circumstances or contrast has beauty if that is what you see.
  17. Love travels faster than anger, hate or judgment. Sending love out brings more back to your area, community and region. You create a blanket of love by sending it out in all directions.
  18. Learning and teaching by example is God’s way.
  19. Always flush out that spot where you store and harbor negative energy. This holds you back from greater deeds. Find it even though you may have effectively hidden it from you.
  20. Grace walks at every vibration. Never feel that you are unreachable by it or God’s love. At any point in your life, God sends you enough grace to meet your needs. This is your truth.

Everlasting Grief

Losing a loved one may start any type of reaction within you. Many things factor into how pronounced you feel the loss. One of the most important factors is how much residual grief you have left from having lost loved ones in the past. If you are not adept at processing grief, much of it may remain even after many years. Then, when you suffer another loss, the residual grief swells up and is exponentially more severe.

Losses in childhood may be very painful, even now. That is where the struggle begins. Many times you suffer loss in childhood and no one processes this event with you. Either the people in your life didn’t realize that you needed special attention or they did not know how to process grief themselves and were unable to help you.

Then you were involved in the ritual of death to some degree. You were at the wake, funeral and burial or you were sheltered from all of it and people were absent from your life without sufficient explanation. This level of involvement impacted how you process grief from that point forward.

Oddly enough your parents more thoroughly explained Christmas and the fictitious Santa Claus then they did of loved ones dying. This could apply to any religion or cultural event that your family practices. This is just an example. Your family may be more comfortable with certain holidays or family events but not at all comfortable with people dying. Very often, children are left to process this significant event alone or with limited information. Even more tragic is when a child is assisted with death and dying by another uninformed child.

The problem with someone dying is that it is an abstract idea. Children are not able to process abstract information early in life. They don’t understand the concept of someone dying. Someone lying in a casket or in an urn is also very abstract. Well, where did grandma go? What happened to her? What does “dead” mean?

The most success with processing grief is when you are presented with very real, factual information in childhood to the extent of your understanding. This requires a thoughtful, considerate adult who is willing to take time with any child while presented with death. This is not just one contact. The child requires input throughout the death/dying ritual. It would also be necessary for someone to touch base with the child at a few different intervals after. This will dispel any misconceptions or gossip that the child may have been presented with.

Most of us didn’t have the benefit of this kind of attention. Parents who suffer from addictions have less patience for helping children and there may be a spike in the substance abuse. Depressed parents or elders will also be unable to satisfactorily walk a child through death. It is also possible that parents or adults are not fully aware of accurate information either. Then, there are adults who are crippled by the loss of this person and are unable to guide anyone through this process. They are overwhelmed and the suffering of others is not a concept they are able to comprehend.

You may remember people responding to the death of a loved one by shutting down. For whatever reason, they do not cope and much of their responsibilities go undone. They disengage with day-to-day life. Anyone in their household would lack much of the attention, care and interaction that they have come to expect or would be appropriate. This leaves them struggling to understand the loss and also the reaction of their loved one.

In every instance, the parent, elder or close loved ones are role models for youth. These adults may not realize how important it is to process grief and regain an emotionally healthy functioning after a period of time. Children will model after any behavior they witness whether intentionally or without consideration.

Why did we go this far back to explain grief? Because this is where the layers begin.

What would be the one most important factor in how you embrace and cope with the death of a loved one? What you believe about the afterlife.

 

Challenges, Turmoil and Disruption

Moving forward in life requires a healthy amount of motivation, intent and coping strategies. If every negative event were to stop all progress, you would not get very far. Your goals and dreams would be continuously pushed back. This may lead to frustration. You would question the quality of your life because you never really get what you want.

The purpose of this post is to encourage you to develop some effective coping skills and a deep sense of faith. Every day experiences do matter but the problem is when you are derailed by them and you don’t get back to your actual chart. The small stuff delays attaining real progress.

It is this continual and repeated frustration that you have sanctioned just by allowing insignificant matters to cloud your divine existence. Keep going. Acknowledge the things that happen each day but still place them in perspective. You truly have better things to do.

Effective coping involves many working parts that create a whole.

  1. Deal in reality. People have a tendency to blow things out of proportion. If your life is a series of crisis situations, there is something wrong with your perspective. Either that or you thrive on drama and turn even simple matters into crisis situations.
  2. Look at the situation without emotion. Deal with the facts and be real about the impact each event has on your life. Some things will bring inconvenience but little turmoil if you are coping effectively.
  3. Understand that you are intended to learn from this. If you build a wall, nothing will be gained. This event will be assigned too much power and much of your true intent will be lost. Rather than a straight line to eternity, you will have to duck, dodge and maneuver around all of your barriers. This wastes precious time.
  4. It is ok to acknowledge what has occurred and continue to move forward but only if there is a minimal impact. If it is a big event that needs your attention, you must take the time to cope and process it. Being avoidant or ignorant is not suggested.
  5. Denial is not recommended either. Brushing off a significant event is not appropriate. Try your best to assign this event with the proper amount of significance. Many people do not realize when they are using denial as an ineffective coping strategy. It may be necessary to work through emotional problems in order to get a reality-based perspective on future events. If you tend to be overly emotional and catastrophize things, denial is a significant problem of yours.

Focus on what is real and what is the actual impact on your life. You have many learned behaviors which influence your current coping strategies. You learned them through life experience and watching other people attempt to cope. This is also when the dysfunction begins. If an elder copes with alcohol, you may do the same. If someone gets violent during stressful times, this may also become one of your tendencies.  If a parent blows things out of proportion, that is your role model to also overreact.

What you didn’t learn from your family, friends and other loved ones you picked up some ineffective coping through trial and error. You may react in a certain way and the problem resolves. That teaches you that this one strategy “works.” It may not be positive or productive but you may start to rely upon it in all matters. Then if this one strategy doesn’t work, you will try something else and see how far that gets you. In this manner you will develop your bank of coping strategies; some good, some bad.

Now that you are seeking spiritual success it is time to take a realistic look at how you manage stress and what your current coping strategies are. These are a few suggestions:

  1. Be honest. You don’t have to remember any lies if you always tell the truth. This is living genuinely.
  2. Do your best. Successful behavior builds upon itself and you gain a higher vibration because you are making an honest effort. The Universe responds to this.
  3. Do not intentionally harm anyone. You always want to know about sins and damnation, be considerate of your interactions with others. How are you impacting anyone in your world? Make sure you are empathetic and accept responsibility when you make a mistake.
  4. Be independent. Accept responsibility for your thoughts and actions. Be wary of blaming others when you have acted with disregard. This is not honest or genuine.
  5. Always be ready to forgive. Some acts are serious and you may not be able to forgive what has happened. You may be able to release any grudge or vengeance and still move forward. Forgiveness is what you do to heal your own soul. It is not completely about the person you are trying to forgive.

Easier said than done! This is a good place to start. Once you begin to gain positive, effective coping strategies you will continue to build upon this solid foundation. Living honestly is always good. This will increase your vibration and bring more success to you personally.

We ask that you have no one to blame but this also means that no one else may take credit for your success.

It’s a Serious Job

Your reaction to this life and the chart you came here to complete is a lot like your view on hard work. If you know how to put some effort into what you do each day you may be less disillusioned by the work you need to complete the goals of your life chart. If you dislike hard work, you probably also dislike putting effort into this earth life.

There are benefits to working hard at your job, career or occupation. Hopefully you earn a decent wage, you have room for advancement and perhaps a raise. Maybe not. The incentive would be less if you feel like your job is a dead end and will not adequately reward you with money, incentives or a good retirement.

Think of your life chart as a business that you started from inception to being fully operational. What you get back is completely dependent upon what you put into it.

  1. If you lack drive, your business will show it.
  2. If you don’t fully comprehend how to run this business, you may leave some goals incomplete. Successes that are haphazard pale in comparison to achievements won realistically and with intent.
  3. If you position this business in a dark and negative area, your opportunities for success will be limited. Maybe your first location is where you are now in life but you will be expected to relocate to brighter more positive areas when possible.
  4. If you have a narrow window for business, you will not invest the proper amount of time into success. No one may step in and meet your goals for you.
  5. If you are only prepared to do half the job, there may be no real benefit to having this business.
  6. If you blame other people or situations for failure, you are not accepting responsibility for what you are doing. You must be able to stand alone and be successful.
  7. If you invest superficial amounts of time and effort the business may not be capable of supporting you and your needs. Your ability to meet your goals requires commitment.
  8. If your business relies very heavily on the nearby businesses and is not fully independent you are not being completely responsible. Your business must be stand-alone but you may position it near other businesses to improve the benefits to everyone nearby.
  9. If you are running a shady business, your gains will not be credible. Goals would be left incomplete.
  10. Sufficient earning, growth and development require constant awareness. Building a successful business takes effort and a willingness to explore. All of your lessons don’t arrive at your door neatly packaged. You need an open mind, faith and drive.

Now that we have recommended you put some effort into building your spirituality and making sufficient progress on your chart we will give you some insider information. Sometimes, all it takes is to relax and get out of your own way.

If you relax you are releasing any blocks, barriers and previous damage. You are ALLOWING your life to come to you. It is possible to keep an open mind and meet each experience as they arise. Any effort may be channeled into allowing life to happen and seeking the answers contained within.

You must also get out of your own way. Release any judgement, opinion and preconceived thinking. Allow life to teach you and be open to new meaning. You don’t know everything and your life is wrought with learned knowledge that you need to replace, release or improve. Meet each day with renewed curiosity. There is always something to learn from even the smallest event. Embrace this discovery and be eager to know more.

This is in the simplest terms; give it some effort, relax and allow life to flow to you and get out of your own way. By actively doing these three steps you are able and willing to learn. Make progress in the areas that you set before you when you wrote this chart. We did not overstate the need to be a “business owner.” It does take work, constant learning and making adjustments to improve your progress. It isn’t easy and it does take continuous monitoring. Your success in life is as important as earning your wage. It is a serious job and you are the only one who can do it.