Save Yourself First

Spirit believes that this is a good time to review a previous subject about becoming healthy and healed prior to “saving” someone else. The analogy is derived from the safety checklist provided on airplanes. Always place your oxygen mask on yourself first before helping someone else put their own on. This includes children. To parents this seems to be the opposite of what you normally do in life. You make sure your child is clean and fed then you focus on yourself. You bundle your child up for cold weather first then make sure that you are warm. There are many examples but the underlying premise is that children, elders, disabled people… usually come first.

Our direction is to heal yourself first then focus upon the others in your life. If you are still dysfunctional, abusing substances, engaging in illegal activities, manipulating others… you are in a limited position to help others. You may have found some success on this site regarding health, wellbeing and spiritual growth and now you want to share your knowledge with others. This may not be the best time to make that additional step.

The best rule is to help others with their own spiritual growth if you feel reasonably assured that you are above reproach. It would be like taking sobriety advice from someone who is actively abusing drugs and alcohol. Or, taking advice about being healthy from someone who is 100 pounds overweight. Be careful. People will question your information just because you seem to be still making positive changes for yourself. Your direction may be very enlightened but your lifestyle will still come into play.

Some things may need to be resolved prior to you providing spiritual advice and direction. These steps are good for everyone still dealing with these issues, but very important for someone seeking to be a spiritual leader.

  1. Sobriety is a good start. Be cautious though because once you refrain from abusing substances you will experience an increase in disturbed coping mechanisms. The substances are your current mode of coping and once these are removed you will show increased anger, frustration, irritability, fight or flight, outbursts, acting out and verbal and/or physical abuse of others close to you.
  2. Abuse toward others in your life. It is difficult to accept spiritual direction from someone who is verbally, physically and emotionally abusive to those close to them. You may not realize what your own behavior says about you but other people will recognize some inappropriate ways that you communicate with loved ones.
  3. Prejudice toward women, men, other nationalities and religions will tip someone off to your underlying animosity. Being spiritually evolved includes allowing others to express themselves according to their own lifestyles.
  4. Seeking financial gains from leading others to salvation. Some people maintain a modest life charging a fee for the spiritual help that they provide. This is acceptable. Seeking an immense financial windfall is not. This would be another clue to others about your intent. In fact, spiritual centers in your area usually know who is providing a service and who is seeking financial gain only. This taints their mission. Greed will darken any passion and attract lower energy beings.
  5. Fidelity is also important. If you are cheating on your spouse, others will question the validity of your direction. It would also be a concern that you would cultivate new romantic relationships from the groups that you are now a part of. Cheating is lying and being dishonest. To lead a successful spiritual group you would need to find a genuine relationship with the Universe. Honesty is important. Your infidelity would compromise your respectability.
  6. Being unable or unwilling to forgive will cloud your ability to lead others to God. This may be one of the most difficult steps for someone to take in their spiritual evolution. It is possibly one of the last steps you take because of your resistance to forgive. Or, perhaps you try to move forward without it, which does not work. It is like taking your personal opinion and placing it before God.
  7. Being brash and crude will lessen the respect that others will be able to give you. Some amount of civility is required to make a good impression upon people who are seeking enlightenment.
  8. Selfishness is easily identified when others communicate with you. People will naturally fear that your own needs will be placed above the needs of others. It is also possible that you will redirect your resources to feed your own lifestyle rather than benefit those seeking God.
  9. Dogma will definitely turn people away. Flexibility is a positive trait when leading others. You must be able to accept them at their current station in life and guide them forward. If you do not tolerate their individuality, history or personal preferences, your words will mean nothing. Some current religions are dogmatic. You would not offer any more appealing guidance than any of them. It would be punishment by them or punishment by you.
  10. Having a closed mind to other faiths, races and possible personal life choices of those who may choose to listen to you will impair your ability to guide. Many people are comfortable blending religious ideas from various belief systems. To insist upon only one avenue will limit your ability to provide a well-rounded experience for the one you are trying to help.



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