Finding love is on our minds. Some of us may have our spouse and are content and ready for the future. Others may have relationships that may or may not survive any length of time. And then, some of us are alone.
The 4 points of love is a diagram that spirit has shown me of 4 points in a diamond shape.
The first point is of attraction and lust. Some relationships don’t get past this level. It is almost entirely based upon physical attraction. There are many relationships that have begun in this level and have not progressed to the next one. It is more of an agreement between two people who are not interested in finding someone else who may be more compatible. It works. It isn’t an entwining of souls but it serves a purpose and the two people are ok with that.
The second point is finding someone with similar likes. There is more of an alignment of these two individuals. It is more deep in meaning and you have begun to feel more of a kinship. It has more depth than physical attraction and you recognize that you have something special.
The third point is dotted with trials and hardships. The honeymoon is over and you are faced with some trying times. You either come together or get pulled apart. There may be breaks in the relationship throughout the stress and turmoil but you eventually converge again.
The fourth point is short or long-term committment. This includes all of the points. There is a physical attraction that persists beyond stress and conflict. You have also found enough similarities that you have multiple levels of connection on many different topics, events or preferences. You feel like a couple even though outside forces may impact upon you and potentially drive you apart. It is an “us against the world” feeling even though you may not agree with your mate on all the specifics.
It is at this fourth point that you begin to choose your mate over some other relationships in your lives. This choice may happen at earlier levels but now it is a deeper choice between perhaps family, friends, jobs, location of residence… At this point you feel committed and you act as a couple and much less as individuals.
Then what happens?
Infidelity occurs when one person feels something lacking. It may not be related to their sex life but they choose to express this disconnect through flirting and perhaps sex. Many times people feel that they perhaps moved too quickly into this committment. Perhaps they aren’t my soul mate after all. Or very often, they are certain the grass is greener!
Emotional and maybe physical abuse may also occur. This is definitely not out of the blue. There would have been many red flags all along but perhaps one or both partners tried to force the relationship. They may resist to question whether it is a healthy attachment or not.
Substances also may impact the couple’s happiness. One or both partners may have addictions. This will impact all relationships and functioning in both their lives. Addictions cause dysfunction in a single person. Then, if they are in a relationship or have a family the dysfunction is compounded.
Illegal activity, lying, and manipulation may also impact the couple. Usually it is only one of the partners. More uncommonly it is both partners. This is very difficult to recover from. One or both people would need to make positive choices and probably seek counseling. It takes a committment to attaining emotional health in order to resolve some serious difficulties as a couple.
There are many other stressors that any couple might face. Our purpose for addressing this topic has everything to do with you, your emotional and physical wellbeing, your happiness, your self-actualization and your spiritual journey.
The journey to God may be solitary much of the time. It is rare to find someone at the same spiritual level, age and social status as you. We want most for you to be emotionally healthy and stable as an individual before finding that loving relationship that dreams are made of.
So many times your ascension is delayed because you are surrounded by people who do not support your maturity and spiritual health. It is far easier to find someone to party with then to find a good support group, meditation group or spiritual life coach. In fact, many friends will actively sabotage your efforts to mature and be responsible.
Why do we urge you to leave an abusive partner, stop abusing substances and avoid people who do, leave that cheating spouse, and refuse to be lied to or manipulated. Because these are the lessons of life. These are the very conflicts and difficult situations that you asked for in order to overcome them and grow closer to God. You came here to resolve all of these troubling things. If you commit to an angry, controlling drunk, then you are not becoming One with God. If your spouse deals drugs from your apartment, you are not fulfilling your destiny. If you have bruises and injuries from being beaten, you are not respecting that you are “of God.”
It isn’t simple. It isn’t ok to just pack up and leave. You have to be sure that you are safe. If you have children you must also keep them safe. It is a process that may take some time for you to distance yourself, make another life for yourself, gather your strength and courage, receive counseling, and develop self-love and self-respect.
We are your gardians. We want you to be physically and emotionally healthy. You are the one that has to take those steps. You must decide to follow your chosen path toward God. It is ok if you choose not to. That is up to you. We only wish to remind you that there is a purpose to this incarnation. You have identified so many successes and achievements to gain. You did not come here to be cheated on, lied to, beaten, put down, and held back.
Trust us. You came here to work for God and be healthy and fulfilled.