Why So Sad?

I come into contact with many people who have unresolved grief. I know this because they are emotionally fragile and seem close to tears when the topic at hand is not something so important.

Any amount of disappointment or even simple mistakes cause a reaction that is obviously out of proportion to the current situation. Their voice breaks and their eyes moisten. It is a rush of emotion that seems to catch them off guard. You may almost see them attempt to swallow their response before they lose their composure.

Why so sad?

Loved ones lost are never really gone. Speak to them or write them a letter. Voice all of those feelings and thoughts that you wished you had said. It is OK. They want you to resolve your grief as well. Your sadness feels so unnecessary to them. All is forgiven. They came to earth to share in the experience with you. All of your conflicts and disappointments were pre-planned. You agreed to come here together and to learn and experience for your two souls to grow.

You are dear friends on the other side. You probably came into life with each other on more than one occasion. Who better to go to school with than your best friend?

Our lives are a progression of experiences. We take these opportunities to learn from a different set of circumstances every time we incarnate. You were siblings. Or even a parent and child. Or you may have been spouses! Who knows? You will as soon as you return home.

Everything falls into place when you cross back over. All of your loved ones come to greet you and you at once know that the troubles you experienced together were all a part of the chart.

Forgiveness belongs to all of us. We give this gift to ourselves and others. Your loved ones in spirit know more deeply exactly how love and forgiveness is automatic and complete.

Stop worrying. If you want to apologize, then do so. If you want an apology from them, just ask. If only it were this easy with those we are still connected to in life!

Try different ways to resolve your longstanding grief.

If you dearly miss your loved one, remember that they are free from pain or illness. They busy themselves by doing things that they enjoy. Most of all, they visit you at times when it matters most like birthdays, weddings, holidays…

If you feel you didn’t have a chance to say “goodbye” or “I love you” then say it now! Feel free to think of them fondly at any time. There need not be any sorrow for they are truly living in a blessed home. The sadness that we usually feel is our own feelings of loss or missing them. Honor them in ways that you feel they will resonate with. Use music, candles, photos, flowers, a fragrance… Love is always in season!

If you have harsh or unresolved feelings, do your share to resolve them. If they are no longer in life the original event likely means very little. This is not a slight against you rather it is because they now know that your situation together was written so that you both could learn from it.  Remember, “best friends together in school.” Their capacity for forgiveness is far easier than ours. We are still inhabiting this dark and negative planet. 

Release all of your feelings of sadness and sorrow. Allow yourself to live freely and completely in this lifetime. Look back upon your life and your loved ones and believe that it was all for the best and there were some difficult lessons included. You may find some of this incredulous but in the end this is all about you and God alone.

Issues about abuse, neglect, drugs and/or alcohol, and many other sources of conflict are still situations to learn from. Our intent in this incarnation is to experience good and bad and still find God and forgiveness. Our souls really are that immense! 

Allow your heart to know only love.

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